365 days ago, as you probably know, I competed in my first fitness competition – one year ago already?!
The whole day was so exciting, my adrenaline was absolutely pumping, it was super rewarding to work so hard, have an end date and know you crushed a goal.
TICK, TICK, TICK!
Many of us start goals and so rarely continue to see them out – my self included so by working really hard for something and being able to inspire others was amazing!
The lead up was hard bloody work but I persisted – the day was exhilarating as mentioned above but what about the aftermath?
I’ve written in previous blogs the effects of competing – it made me pretty crazy to say the least and it took me a good 6 months to completely get over it.
So now in a stable head set what are my thoughts looking back now?
Honestly I feel as though it isn’t healthy for the body – as funny as that sounds as all you’re doing it eating healthy foods!
I use to follow a lot of Instagram accounts of girls who would do multiple comps – they’d get so SO lean only to blow out weeks, if not days after their comp… they were trapped in a never ending cycle of binge eating and shredding – loosing your period because your body fat is that low all for the sake of frolicking around on stage in a bikini isn’t okay and can really effect you in later in life when trying for babies but in ‘comp life’ it is something that happens and isn’t really frowned upon?!
**FYI my body fat wasn’t that low and that didn’t happen to me…..
I felt so ‘puffy’ after competing – which only made me want to compete again to get back into my old routine and stay lean – it is such an addictive thing so I get what those girls were going through!
I’ve said it before I didn’t loose much weight whilst competing maybe a couple kg’s but after the comp I blew out to the most I’ve ever weighed EVER – which coming from being super lean was scary – it made me hate myself and my body and I knew that was wrong.
So how did I snap out of it?
-I unfollowed all fitness models off all forms of social media – there is so much rubbish and fakeness out there I didn’t need it shoved in my face on the daily. #instababes
-I took a break from training – at this point of time I felt like I was forcing my self to train and they were shit house sessions so I listened to my body and took some time off.
-I went on a holiday (to China) – nothing better to break your routine then a holiday, I was able to relax, explore, unwind and re-set – this holiday truly made me feel, well, me again.
-I stopped weighing my self – F*cking hate the scales, I always have so I don’t even know why I was standing on them.
-I stopped looking at myself in the mirror in a crop top and jocks – sucking in and seeing what I ‘should’ look like – Looking back now I realise ‘should’ look like can suck a fat one I’m fabulous!
-I manned the f*ck up and admitted I wasn’t myself and decided to do something about it. (Did the above steps)
So a year on I’m feeling lean, strong, motivated, inspired and fabulous – ready to take on the world every single day knowing I’m the best I can be and I look great – I’m not fat, I’m not skinny – I’m healthy and vibrant and that’s what matters most!
Stay Strong & Stretch,