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Week 19

I feel like my body went through a lot of changes this week…

Monday we had our halfway (OMG) scan – it was SO awesome to see little Prince again, we have been feeling him kick but to see his little face was the best!

Last scan was at 13 weeks – he was a lot bigger this time!! Everything is measuring ahead – especially his belly which measuring in the 98.4 percentile on the chart – I knew he was stealing all my food hence why I’m hungry what feels like all the time!

Everything else in the scan went great which is awesome!! My next scan is at 27 weeks can’t wait!!!

I’m finding my nose isn’t as blocked this week while I’m sleeping and although I’m still dreaming they don’t seem to be as weird dreams like the last two week – thank god!

Body wise is feeling the most difference this week – I had been feeling these pains while working and thought I might had strained a muscle, I told the Ob last week and she didn’t seem to concerned so neither was I… I found it to only be when I was working – once I got home and sat down the pain went away. When I went for a walk on Monday I had this extreme sharp pain through my left lower side (I guess under where my bump is) I continued walking and it kind of went away then came back on the right side… I was intense – by the end of the walk I felt like I was walking so slow and hunched over like a really bad stabbing cramps.

Round Ligament Pain – after a quick google search it seems to be what I’m experiencing – I only get it when walking and at work tho (assuming because I walk around a lot) I don’t get it while at pilates or lifting weights…. If you don’t know what RLP is it is a ligament that attaches from your womb to your groin and as the belly get bigger is can strain until I guess it stretches with you… I really hurts! But it doesn’t last too long and I find once I sit down it goes away pretty quick – I’ve only walked once this week because I’m scared it’ll happen again!

Training is the same as the other weeks with strength, pilates and swimming – (although I haven’t swum yet this week its Thursday which is a rest day so planning on it tomorrow)

Lying on my back also doesn’t feel that great this week either – I know from 20 weeks you should start laying on your side due to a main blood vessel that can get compressed so sleeping has been tough as a back sleeper, my shoulders are quite sore from sleeping on my sides I also notice it while demo-ing at work or just laying on my back for too long its uncomfortable….

Tired-ness has come back next level this week – I STILL haven’t has my iron infusion (its booked for next hospital visit in a couple weeks thank goodness) and I’ve only eaten steak once this week rather then nearly every second day like the weeks before so assuming Little Prince is sucking me dry….

My belly towards the end of this week is noticeably a lot bigger of a night time and a lot more people seem to be noticing – which is nice, it’s almost past the awkward in-between stage where I might be pregnant but I also may just be fat lol

Lastly I sneezed and nearly wet myself – like legit some wee defs came out – although me and Matt thought it was hilarious I’m focusing more on my pelvic floor and have also booking in with a pregnancy and pelvic floor physio so I’ll update you on how that goes next week…

With all these changes I’m convinced Little Prince is having a big grow week!

Can’t wait for week 20 and what it has to bring! (also can’t believe I’m already there!)

Oh the nursery has plaster – its not finished but it’s a step closer whoooo!!!

Week 17 & 18

These two weeks have been super similar & have just gone so bloody quick so I’m combining them!!

The main stand out over these last two week have been my dreams – they have been SO bizarre, really strange sometimes scary and very vivid…  Matt said this week I’ve laughed in my sleep and gasped myself awake – both of which I don’t remember.

My nose is also SO blocked of a night-time – during the day it’s completely fine! I asked the Dr and she said its because of more blood circulating around the body and there being more blood vessels in the nose – I’ve woken up with my mouth completely dry from obviously breathing through my nose all night!!

Little Prince is also kicking – often, it wasn’t the ‘flutters’ like people described or I read about it was more tapping maybe you could call it bubbling but I would say it was distinct tapping – I felt it in week 16 but wasn’t sure if it was bubs or not – but over these last two weeks it’s been a lot more regular and distinct…

Training wise I’ve been consistent for the last three weeks:
x2 Strength
x1 Pilates (plus taking 2-3 sessions demo-ing most the session)
x1 Swimming laps
and walking!

Feeling good!!

I had three appointments in week 18 – just a general local GP check up to get my referral for my 20 week scan (yay!), the second two were at the hospital one with the Ob and one with the Physician – I didn’t really know who was for what but later was told (by Matt lol) that the Ob was all about bubs and the physician was all about me – going into high risk now because of my UC they are keeping a close eye on me to make sure I stay in remission and all so far is looking good!! (double yay!!)

The Dr and the Ob checked Little Princes heart rate with the Doppler – it was perfect and so nice to hear – both times Little Prince kicked the Doppler off my belly and both dr’s commented on how active he is – fingers crossed that settles once he is earth side lol

Thus far I’ve put on 4kg – my boobs have gotta be weighing in at 2kgs a pop – they feel and look huge!! The Dr said I’ll probably be gaining .500g per week, which is such a strange thing to think of – still getting my head around that fact!!!

My body although feeling different, it’s feeling good! My belly is defs getting bigger – again there is such a big difference from my morning stomach to my bed bed tummy! Can’t believe I’m so close to half way already and the babys rooms doesn’t even have walls hahhahaohshithahahah

Week 16

I don’t know if it is because Matts home again or me but this week I’ve felt great!

I haven’t been training all that much because I just have zero energy and feel shit most the time – this week was different, finally back into training because it was what my body wanted and because it felt good to do so!

Sunday- Lower Strength
Monday- Walked
Tuesday- Swam (first time probably since my paul saddler days aka 20 years ago lol)
Wednesday – Pilates
Thursday – Rest day (helped Matts sister move house all day)
Friday – Upper Strength
Saturday – Walk

That’s how my week panned out, I must admit after Pilates on Wednesday I was knackered – I felt really tried – maybe I should be easing myself into it but I’m no good at the ‘easing’ process – all or nothing kinda gal…

I’m still napping most days for an hour or so and still haven’t heard about my iron infusion but I have a hospital appointment coming up so will check in with them..

Diet wise I’m eating a lot more regularly then I use to, pre-pregnancy fasting is something I would do most days and then not really snack where as I’m finding I need to eat every few hours to relieve any sickness that starts to come on. Is it heathly? I’d say yes mostly (I say this as I just finished a malteaser bunny) but I’m not being strict on my diet – again not that kinda gal…

We also bought a pram this week which was super exciting! We haven’t bought anything – going into the baby shops for the first time was overwhelming as hell and there are SO many different brand of everything it was ridic but we knew we were looking at prams so stuck to that section for now – we went with the easiest, lightest, new parent proof one we could find – SUCCESS!!

I also think I felt little prince kick, it’s happened a few times but I have NO idea if that’s what I’m feeling or not, it’s like tiny, TINY little thumps in my tummy – strange bloody feeling that’s for sure!

What an overly positive week – here is to hoping there is more like this!

DISCLAIMER: This is my first week like this – don’t think I’ve been training everyday and eating like a health freak the last 16 weeks because that’s refs not true – weeks 6-7 to week 14-15 were rough!

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel

Week 15

IT’S A BOY – The genetic testing came back all clear at week 10 and we found out Little Prince is in fact a boy!! Another huge hurdle!

My nausea has FINALLY stopped, thankkk god for that!!!!!

It was hit and miss during week 14 some days were good and some days were terrible but no sickness during week 15!

But it’s never really smooth sailing is it??

We had out first hospital meeting at week 13 – everything went really well, we are having the baby at Sunshine – this is where all my specialist Dr’s are for my UC so they can all communicate with each other. They have been great thus far too!

After the hospital appointment at week 14 I got a call from the hospital on the Monday (When I was 15 weeks) saying they are transferring me from orange unit (which is basically like a general unit) to a ‘High Risk’ unit – hearing this scared me. Having UC is what caused my last miscarriage and is the reason why I’m now a high risk pregnancy – its just scary to hear but least I’m getting monitored the way I should, they said that if ANY of my UC symptoms come back I need to go in ASAP as it can cause preterm birth. Matt was in South America at this time (on our last big holiday before we started trying for a baby!) and I was home alone absorbing the information – I don’t want to get sick, I just want the baby to be healthy. I sobbed, half hormonal and half reality shock that UC will never leave me.

On the Wednesday I had a meeting with my Gastroenterologist my second follow up since my colonoscopy, she was happy my symptoms, which seemed to be in remission but was also concerned about how bad my last colonoscopy was – it showed that I have Pan Colitis – there are different levels of UC – mine is through my whole colon, not just one section. There were also abnormal cells, similar to cancer cells in my colon – again scary to hear. BUT I seemed to be reacted well to the medication – she just wants to keep a close eye on me. She was also concerned with my iron count and insisted on an iron infusion – this made me happy – I’ve been tired, like really tired, like napping 3 times a day tired. So getting this infusion should help with that!

So a couple speed bumps this week – but my UC is still under control and besides being tried I’m feeling SO good. I’m just glad the dr’s are keeping a close eye on me, I really feel like I’m under the best care possible….

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel X

The First Trimester

Holly shit we are having a baby!

Once the initial shock settled, the nerves kick in.

I was scared, I couldn’t go through what we went through last time – as the 7 week mark came closer and closer the more nervous I got.

Last time the first ultrasound is where it all went wrong.

This time we opted for a local GP that specialises in pregnancy and also opted for an ultrasound clinic locally – Siles in BM – I couldn’t recommend Ken ANY more – he is amazing and super informative.

Even just doing these two simple things make the process seem a lot more professional and real compared to last time.

Our first ultrasound – I felt SO nervous – what if there was no heartbeat again?

Lying on the bed Ken made me feel calm and Matt was being so strong even tho I know he was just as scared as me.

And there it was a tiny little blob that is our little Prince AND a heartbeat to match.

Tears of joy came streaming down my face and instant relief.

From this point morning sickness increased A LOT – I never experienced it last time.

And from the sounds of it everyone experiences different symptoms but mine went as follows….

There was nothing bloody morning about it. It was ALL DAY sickness.

I never really vomited, I would just dry reach which I think is worse, I would just rather vomit and get on with my day.

The best way to describe this was like an ALL day hangover – I perked up usually by 3pm just in time to put on a brave face and head to work. The first trimester is hard – not many people know and its when you’re probably struggling the most physically and mentally yet no one has a clue!

Along with the sickness my boobs grew A LOT and were very sore and I was also super tired, napping daily and hardly training at all! Not even walking which for me is a big deal – I felt like a slob – doing nothing all day but laying down on the couch, it’s something I wasn’t use to.

I grew sick of this feeling and at 9 weeks I got acupuncture which is suppose to help with the sickness….

It helped, it helped TOO much – so much so that I felt like all my signs that I was pregnant were gone, I thought we had lost the baby. I know this is why I got the acupuncture in the first place but I didn’t realise it as going to make me feel like this!

I booked in to see my Dr that ordered me to have a blood test and an ultrasound.

It was a nerve-racking week waiting for both of these things – the ultrasound went great.

Another sigh of relief, I now know that this feeling of nervousness does not leave – when you don’t know what’s happening inside you and you just want everything to be okay it is really hard to relax, especially when things didn’t turn out as planned the first time around.

This was basically my life for up until 14 weeks – 2 months on ongoing fatigue, nerves, soreness, weird pains, nausea and a f*ck heap of googling to figure out if it was all normal.

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel X

We’re having a baby– how we got here – our Rainbow Baby.

July 21st2018 – Matt and I lost something so special to us, our sweet little Blueberry Prince.

The day we went in for our first ultra sound of our first baby we left disappointed and confused only hours later I started bleeding a lot. The physical and emotional journey after that was a tough one. One you don’t really know how to deal with or act – like with everything in life you just take each day as it comes.

Thinking back to that day still brings tears to my eyes, I hate that we had to go through that, I hate that so many women have to go through that physically and I hate that so many couples have to go through that emotionally.

I now know that it was because of my Ulcerative Colitis that we lost our baby.

A hard pill to swallow, something I let get out of control eventually took its toll on my body, our bodies are smart they know when you are able to carry a baby and when you aren’t – I wasn’t able to at this point of time and it makes complete sense, if I’m loosing weight, going to the toilet 15-20 times a day, bloody bowel movements – I’m extremely sick, there is no way a baby will be getting the nutrients it needs – hell I wasn’t getting the nutrients I need.

After the miscarriage I was forced to look after my health.

I started medication, had much more closer monitoring by specialist dr’s, had a colonoscopy to see the extent of damage done to my bowels, found a good local GP and a naturopath – I HIGHLY recommend this – throughout my UC and my first pregnancy journey I had crappy bulk billing dr’s – don’t do this, research dr’s and if you’re not happy with them CHANGE!

By December I was feeling SO good – my weight was back to normal (52kg pre hospital – Dec 58kg feeling good), no blood in stools, x1 bowel movement a day, training pilates, weights, boxing, walking and even RUNNING!!

I was in such a better place physically and mentally; when I look back I couldn’t believe how long I dealt with being sick for. I don’t know how I functioned at all – its funny how we just do tho!

My period was off after getting out of hospital in October– my body had been through a lot and it made sense but knowing we were wanting to try for a baby soon it was just another set back. I tried not to worry about it too much because besides that I was healthy, which I hadn’t felt in a long time!

The ‘Plan’ was to go on a holiday in April (South America) as our last big trip before we start trying for a baby, also by this time our private health insurance will cover all the maternity needs as we were wanting to go private for the birth (this was to kick in November) – there is a 12 month waiting period ladies if you didn’t know that and want to go private add it on NOW!

The reality: Australia day weekend I went out and had a big day – day drinking that led to night drinking that led to a pretty decent hangover the next day! My period was late, by over a week and I put it down to still being out of sync because it had been! Pregnancy didn’t even cross my mind AT ALL – I even felt like I had cramping pains that my period was coming…

It just never did… So I went out Sunday and on Tuesday I decided to do a test just to eliminate that possibility – I didn’t even tell Matt I was doing it because I was sure it was going to be negative!

To my surprise it was NOT negative – it was extremely positive.

Shocked, excited and confused – I waited for Matt to get off the phone as he had back to back sales calls – he came out of his office extremely chuffed after closing all the calls and I was just waiting for him in the kitchen figuring out how am I going to blab this out!

No words came out I just showed him the test – just as shocked as me we laughed, cried and hugged – although not planned for this moment – when the body is ready the body is ready.

Life has funny ways – I was 5 weeks pregnant.

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel X

Light at the end of the tunnel…

PART 1: My Darkness.

I’ve written this blog over and over again in my head – I’ll even wake up in the middle of the night and think I really need to write this down…

So here I am.

Its been 6 months since my last blog – I was in a very emotionally drained place – walls were falling down around me and I haven’t felt a struggle like that in like well forever…

After a miscarriage towards the end of last year, going through personal hardship, my health completely broken down and ending up in hospital I had hit rock bottom. It was hard to see any positives and would quite so often find myself questioning “why me?” – I know life only gives us what we can handle and from every situation is a lesson but whilst going through such low times it really is hard to see anything besides the overwhelming sadness that fills your body.

If you are experiencing this – like so many of us do – I promise there is a light. Although it may be hard to see that right now I promise it does get easier, when everything feels like its falling down around you and you are drowning I promise you there is a light.

PART 2: My Light.

Now I can see it, looking back at all the bad I can see the light, as awful as things may have been I see the reasons this hand was dealt to me.

It forced me to look within, to question relationships and what was serving me and what was only bringing me down more – it made me focus on me.

Both physically and mentally – I know now it all starts with me.

IF I’m not looking after myself everything else crumbles – we are so quick to put others needs before our own, it’s just take, take, take and no give – this leaves a toll on you. Remember that – just like they say on the airplanes – fit your own mask before assisting others.

When I didn’t put my health first it only became worse – when I ignored my mental state it only became worse.

I see that now.

December 2018 I started feeling like my old self, eating well, training hard, feeling positive and vibrant – a cherry on the top was that my Ulcerative Colitis was now in remission – the thing that Dr’s believe may have been the reason a miscarriage occurred in the first place – I was no longer going to the toilet upwards of 20 times a day, having accidents, near misses, being drained of all energy and weighing a lot less then was I was meant to – I was like a normal person again, I forgot what it felt like to feel this energy and happiness.

This remission would not have come about if I was not put in hospital and referred to GOOD specialist Dr’s (I’ve only seen crappy ones in the past whom made me thought they were all like this so I’ll just go it alone) – a perfect example of a lessoned learnt.

If I had of not gone into remission and felt so vibrant, fit and healthy I would have not fallen pregnant again… more on this in the next blog.

Life has funny ways, always testing and surprising us wether we are ready or not – don’t let it engulf you, take each day as it comes, focus on YOU.

Find the light because I promise it’s there.

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel X

Body Not Changing? Here’s The Real Reason Why… 

A lot of us look in the mirror while getting ready first thing in the morning…

What do we see?

What do we tell ourselves?

‘Wow I look great, check out my ass’ ?

OR

‘God I’m disgusting, look how fat my ….. is’ ?

For many of us we start our day by allowing ourselves to say something negative about our bodies – we welcome bad thoughts without even realising we are doing it.

If your partner were to whisper into your ear first thing every morning saying ‘good morning honey, your thighs are looking big and your cellulite is gross’..

Would you allow it?

HELL NO!

So why is it okay for you to be telling yourself these things

EVERY.F*CKING.MORNING?!

Did you know mental and emotional stress causes a chemical in your brain to react and your body goes into protection mode.

Cortisol is the bodies ‘stress’ hormone. It is released in response to fear or stress by the adrenal glands dumping sugar into the blood stream – if you are constantly feeling fear or stress this hormone will be constantly realised into the blood stream.

Pffft as if a tiny little hormone can effect my body that much.

High cortisol levels have been proven to interfere with learning and memory, lower immune function and bone density, INCREASED WEIGHT GAIN, blood pressure and heart disease.

It also increases your risk of depression and mental illness.

Do I have your attention yet?

SO if you’re eating the best diet in the world and STILL not getting results you should look at the environment you are living in and what you are saying to yourself.

Things you can do to help metabolise cortisol:

-Deep Sleep – not getting your 8 hours? This could be leaving a huge indent. Try meditation. (I use the app calm)

-Exercise – also metabolises cortisol and also releases the feel good chemical dopamine so can also help depression. Exercise doesn’t always have to be intense it might just be a walk in the fresh air to help clear your mind. If you need to change your training environment here is the link application link for Royale Fitness, the most positive training environment you’ll ever find – Royale Fitness Access

-Laughter – is also another good one to help combat cortisol. You know when you really, REALLY laugh your jaw gets sore and you cant breathe – how good do you feel. Forcing this just never works I usually watch random FB videos that have me cracking up – stupid & time wasting? Maybe but it makes me feel good!

So all in all to keep off weight you must love.

Love yourself and those around you.

Love is safety and loving yourself is key to it all.

Happy New Year Y’all

Can’t wait to bring you another year of TalkingWithTel, after our miscarriage last year I didn’t get back to writing which is something I truly loved doing – I’m back with your weekly dose of real-ness baby! 

Stay Strong & Stretch,

Tel X

And Now You Are Gone: Our Miscarriage Story…

Here I am 3am 21stJuly, tears uncontrollably steaming down my face.

Why us?

We are a young, fit, healthy people.

Could I have done anything differently? Is it my fault? Why couldn’t we keep you? Why does it hurt so much?

28 years old and I know miscarriage is something that happens but I’ve never knew it’s something I would have to deal with.

Yesterday we went in at 1pm to see you for the very first time, we had been keeping track of what you looked like via google although not much like a baby just yet you were definitely starting to form and were the size of a blueberry, we had been calling you Little Blueberry Prince all week. We were so fucking excited to see our little blueberry – to see a heartbeat and know everything was okay in there, that I was giving you a good little home until March.

It was supposed to be a happy day, we were so uncontrollably happy!

Laying on the ultrasound bed the man asks us if it’s our first and jokingly tell us to enjoy our time as we are about to get very busy.

Then his humour sense changed, he asked me when then first day of my last period was – which I knew – I was logging everything. He said there was a pregnancy but measuring 2 weeks behind where it should be and then basically “come back in 2-3 weeks, sorry there is anything we could see today, goodbye”

No conversation of how big the baby should be, what the fuck is going on or what the fuck to do.

We said we were first time parents – you can obviously see how confused we are – give us something – anything.

We left the ultrasound clinic quiet. I was emotional. I cried the whole way home from Werribee, this isn’t right, it was supposed to be a happy day we were getting photos of Little Prince to surprise my Mum, we were supposed to see a heartbeat then celebrate and get burritos, I’d planned to have the night off work to celebrate finally being able to see a heartbeat and labelling this as real.

Now I’m sitting here feeling sad, with a hot water bottle on my belly to help with the intense cramping and toilet paper down my pants because I couldn’t leave the house to buy pads last night. I’m broken.

Since finding out about this pregnancy my mind had always reverted back to miscarriage, I was nervous about it, looking up online what the percentage was of it happening, Matt reassured me we’ll be fine but I was holding off excitement until I saw Little Prince inside of me. I thought I was just being super paranoid, you know thinking of the worst-case scenario. In saying this I still was looking at prams and have a whole Pintrest album dedicated to maternity clothes, what to buy, info to know and nursery inspirations. I started to let my guard down at 6-7 weeks, excitement was in full swing and my Pintrest board was growing at a rapid rate.

Once we got home from the Ultrasound clinic Matt & I had a lay down in bed – trying to convince ourselves that maybe that ultrasound was fine and we have the dates a little muddled.  Laying there both feeling down, yet trying to stay optimistic we both fell asleep – I had mild stomach cramps but I thought it might have been UC cramping or I was just hungry because it was about 2pm and I hadn’t eaten lunch yet not what was about to come next.

The cramping got progressively worse and different to UC – I got up to go to the toilet and there it was blood, large amounts of clotted blood, I broke down instantly.

This was it.

We had lost our baby.

The same place I found out about you, the same place I found out we lost you.

Wildly checking each clot to see if a tiny Little Blueberry Prince could be seen.

I get off the toilet pull myself together as much as I could, I now have to break it to Matt, fuck this isn’t fucking fair.

In the hallway he hugs me – I really break down now – we really breakdown now – so defeated we go back to the bedroom and lay there in silence just holding each other. There were no words for it.

What do you even say? I felt worse for the few people we had told whom were also so excited for us today we now have to tell them what has happened – I don’t deal with sympathy well.

What do you even do?? Do I let it run its course? Go to the Dr? I had to use Google to find out – no one tells you this stuff, this is all new ground and we have no idea what the fuck was going on, all we knew is that we had zero control over what was happening right now and that is something we find hard to deal with.

Mum messaged me – “Hey you home?” I didn’t want to see anyone but if there was one person I wanted to see and tell then and there it was her, Mum’s intuition huh coming around at the most perfect time to pick us up when we were at our most vulnerable.

She walked through the door and I just broke down again, she was concerned she hadn’t known about anything – we were waiting for the photos we were supposed to get today.

I got the words out about what had happened, she hugged me harder.

She always knows what to do and say. We both felt better having her around and hearing her advice on what to do next and even have her distract us for a bit.

She suggested to go back to the Dr, explain what has happened and she’ll give you the next step wether to let it run its course or if you go in for an operation to clear everything out properly.

After dinner she left, both Matt and I had zero energy. The day couldn’t of gone any worse.

The cramping intensified, it was really bad now, I had to lay on the floor in the foetal position, going through the emotional roller coaster apparently wasn’t enough, lets add pain so bad it’ll leave you with no choice but to curl in a ball and cry hoping that it’ll all pass soon.

Trying to remain in somewhat of an optimistic headspace I thought to myself – ‘I can’t lay here like this, just get up, what are you doing? Look at you on the floor, get up, you’ve got this.’

And I just couldn’t – I was bet.

As the pain grew more and more I was force to work up the courage to attempt different yoga positions to help ease the pain a little bit which actually did work – it worked enough I was able to stand up and walk myself back down to the lounge room and take some more Nurofen. Matt got me a hot water bottle which also helped ease the pain – he is so amazing.

We spent the next couple hours laying on the couch watching shitty TV to distract us from an absolute horrible and unfair day. We’d occasionally get words out like “we’ll be okay” and “I love you” but overall it was just hugging supportive silence.

9:30pm Matt put fresh hot water in my hot water bottle and off to bed we went.

I couldn’t lay there in the dark, my mind would just tick – we put a movie on again to distract us from what was a blurred and surreal reality until we finally fell asleep holding each others hand. We didn’t have to say anything we just knew that having the comfort and support of one another was all we needed.

And now I’m here – sitting in the dark unable to sleep I needed to get everything down in words so it would stop playing over, again and again in my head – it is now 3:51am.

I think to myself, how am I supposed to face everyone tomorrow, even the next day and pretend to be happy? They have no idea how much I’m hurting inside – no idea about what rollercoaster that had just occurred and I just show up and pretend everything is okay? Like nothing happened? Just continue on with my life?

Maybe that’s what’s wrong? We don’t talk about these things; we deal with them in silence knowing eventually time will heal all.

Not only was this a complete shock and new experience for us but we had no idea what to do – there is no guidance, no where to go and procedure to follow.

We felt so alone even tho I know miscarriage happens to every 1 in 4 women. (Thanks to Google)

If it is a relatively common occurrence why aren’t more people talking about it?

What do all the other women do? Feel isolate, alone and hollow just like me?

Expected just to get back to normal life? Not talk about it?

If this has happened to you, you are not alone – I don’t know why the universe does these things, it is unfair to feel so many emotions in such little time – extreme highs to extreme lows.

As Matt kept saying at least we know we can fall pregnant. When the time is right we will try again, not without worry, caution or concern but as long as we have each other we know we will be okay.

I’m hoping that in reading this you will be aware, know that support is out there don’t be afraid to reach out for it, people don’t know what they don’t know, it doesn’t have to be kept a secret because 1 in 4 chances are the people you are hiding it from have gone through the exact same situation and can give you the support and guidance you need.

You just need to know:

You aren’t alone, this isn’t your fault, and you will get back up but for now feel the emotions that are running through you, do not pass them off and sweep them under the rug, feel them whole heartedly it is okay to hurt.

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel X

5 Reasons Why You ALWAYS Fail.  

As winter begins (hopefully) to start to fade away we begin to become a little more inspired and motivated – a completely natural thing I see each year within the fitness industry.

As you get out of your winter rut and start planning and goal setting I see common trends happen every single year that I want to highlight to stop you from making these same mistakes and to stop self-sabotaging your results!

When you sit down and plan your little heart out about all the amazing things you are going to achieve this spring and summer, it’s only naturally to feel a sense of excitement and motivation – you are READY!!!

Wether it be get to X amount of training sessions OR loose X amount of weight OR run X amount of km’s – whatever it is you want to achieve in the beginning there is no stopping you.

You know exactly what you want and when you want it by.

The problem is women tend to make these 5 mistakes whilst on their journey, I’ve listed them below in hopes that you can recognise and learn from them to help you achieve great things this summer….

HERE ARE 5 COMMON MISTAKES I SEE THAT SET WOMEN BACK FROM REACHING THEIR GOALS:

1) YOU ARE NOT PREPARED – I mean you are organised but that’s a totally different ball game – writing a list is different to getting the things on the list done.  Being organised means writing a shopping list and all your meals for the week, being prepared means going out to the shops and buying the things on this list, then coming home and preparing as much as you can for the week ahead. Lists are easy – setting out and hitting everything on the list is hard and what really matters at the end of the day. The more prepared you are the less room you have to fail. If you have your food ready to grab first thing in the morning that will stop you from buying shit for lunch.

2) FAIL TO CELEBRATE THE SMALL WINS – You ate amazing, hit all your training session and you feel so bloody good BUT the scales say you only lost .500g this week – I know I’ve been here and it is disheartening, it hurts – all that effort and a measly 500g is all that comes off – this isn’t the way you should be thinking. If your goal is to loose weight this is a win, if you keep this up for 12 weeks that is 6kgs down!  Plus think about how good you are feeling and all the other amazing efforts you did this week that you wouldn’t of usually of done. Learn to celebrate these wins because they are what will get you to the finish line!

3) BECOME OVERWHELMED – One week goes by and you realise still how far you have to go – it gets overwhelming and seems impossible so you just want to quit. Rather then looking at things day by day you look at the big picture and that big picture can sometimes seems impossible. It isn’t. You just have to look at it a little different, rather then saying okay I have to hit 40 training sessions in 12 weeks break it down smaller, into a week by week basis. If you hit these small targets of 4 sessions a week it will get you to the big outcome. 4 sessions doesn’t seem as daunting as 40! The same goes for weight loss – wanting to loose 10kgs in 12 weeks rather then looking at the bigger numbers of 10kg and 12 weeks break it down to smaller wins – .850g per week is all you have to aim for.
Lay brick by brick and eventually you will have a wall.

4) WHO YOU HANG WITH MATTERS – Sadly not everyone wants to see you win. More times then not they are actually ready and expecting you to fail and will do anything in their power to have that happen, maybe not directly, it might be a comment here or there or a “C’mon one chocolate won’t hurt” OR “Just miss the gym this once.” OR “Why are you even doing this?” OR “You’re addicted to fitness” OR “Don’t loose anymore weight” – trust me I could go on and on forever and you girls cop it from so-called ‘friends’. You don’t want or need negative people trying to sabotage you- choose whom you hang out with wisely because they influence you more then you know.

5) IT WILL BE HARD – Most goals you set out to do are not going to be easy. Some days you will crush it and the next you will not want to get out of bed to train and will want to eat everything in sight. If reaching goals were easy we wouldn’t have an obesity epidemic on our hands. When things get hard it is okay, step back take a breath and remember WHY you started. If you have a hard day and you miss training or eat terribly – it is okay, it is human! Know from the beginning that this will happen, one bad day wont ruin your results just as one good day one get you to the end results either.

If there is anything you can take out of all of this is to not over complicate things.

Be realistic, prepared and keep it simple, do the same daily good habits over and over – this will lead to the end goal.

You don’t need fancy supplements, magic potions, crazy workouts, ridiculous diets or heath food fads – do the simply shit consistently and I guarantee you will get there!

I believe in you.

Stay Strong & Stretch,
Tel X